Don't Worry, I can Blackmail Myself! Part 4

It's been awhile since I have written anything truly embarrassing about myself.  So why not revive that genre of my writing and really go all in.

I woke up this morning with songs from Information Society in my head.  It brought back many memories so I got on ITunes and bought the album for a trip down memory road.  While I was listening to one song in particular it brought me right back to a Junior High/ High School crush and potato harvest.  Odd combination I know, but have you met me?  Enough said.

So.  This boy, who shall remain nameless, was a year older than me in high school and didn't know I existed outside of Jarom's little sister.  You see he was friends with my brother.  He had many.  I thought they were so cool.  And hence my crush.  Well in Junior High, which explains some of it, I expressed my secret love by making a picture.  It was a full sheet of pink and red hearts with a large heart in the center with this boy's name in the middle.  I was not stupid enough to have it at school with me, so I taped it to the back of my bedroom door... a place of honor.  Later this door was to house posters of Brett Michaels, Sebastian Bach, and a plethora of other bands.  But not in Junior High.

I thought I was safe in my unknown crush.  I don't think I told a single friend about it.  But alas, the fates conspired against me.  Imagine my surprise when one day my brother had this particular friend over and I found this guy walking out of MY ROOM!  There's no way he missed my awesome hearted junior high crushing expression of puppy love.  I wanted to die right there on the spot.  I don't even know what I did after that.  I don't know what he said or did, I just wanted to die.

From then on I knew I could never even hope of him giving me the time of day.  Though that didn't stop the crush.  Information Society was one of the tapes we listened to over and over during potato harvest.  Anytime "Repetition" came on it reminded me of my crush... the one I still had.  The one that was accompanied by feelings of humiliation.  It really makes no sense... now that I think about it this all explains a lot about my high school experience.  Huh.

Enjoy.