Thursday, July 8, 2010

No Pressure

I’m am sometimes the worst when it comes to acting out under pressure. Whether that’s acting out in a bad way (like uber obnoxious I-can’t-believe-I-just-did-that-where-is-the-hole-that-is-supposed-to-swallow-me mode) or the complete lack of acting out which stems from my childhood fear of not being accepted if you only knew who I really am.

I know I have blogged about this before and I find it somewhat disturbing that it has reared its ugly head yet again. Don’t my insecurities have something better to do? Why can’t those energies go into backyard tree removal, or gourmet cooking? I’d even settle for laundry folding at this point. Sigh.

My point you ask? This. Please don’t judge me on first time meeting experiences. I am a fraction if my witty self when it comes to meeting new people. Always have been and I fear I always will. I don’t really warm up that much until a few times in. I like to think that I do an okay job of at least not being too terribly awkward, but… no promises.

Oh great, now I don’t know how to wrap this up without sounding awkward again. Double sigh…


  1. I think you're awesome. And I would take quiet and slow-to-warm-up over what I do which is feel-so-uncomfortable-I-must-keep-talking-at-all-times anyday!

  2. You crack me up. Honestly I don't quite know what you are talking about, but it made me laugh. Thanks :)

  3. Leslie I miss you! Seriously, you need to live closer or make more money so you can fly me out to see you!

    Shaz, thanks for the words of support!

  4. Your first impression is great! Don't worry! I will always love you!