Monday, March 29, 2010

Toilet Texting

Okay, admit it.  Most of you are grossed out but like a train wreck you just have to keep watching/reading. 

I work at Utah State University in the Catering office.  Conveniently located on the second floor of the Taggart Student Center where all the action happens.  My office also just happens to be across the hall from the rest room that also functions as a mother's lounge (lactation station)/dressing room/there's-clearly-no-better-place-to-sleep-than-in-here.  I suppose in fairness there are two over-stuffed black leatherish couches in there.  Why?  Seriously, no idea.  But there are several other places on campus I can think of to take a quick snooze that don't involve other people's bodily functions and the hearing thereof.

This restroom has provided many an office discussion.  Like the time there was a couple of girls looking up each other's noses while lying in each other's laps.  Or the TP vandalist who would fill entire toilets full of tp so they wouldn't flush and then just leave. Structurally speaking, my favorite feature is the tile floor that earily resembles a half played minesweeper field.  It's all I can do sometimes not to flag the bombs and declare victory.  But enough.

So, as I was visiting the rest room this fine March day I noticed the sounds of texting coming from the stall next to me.  That's right, texting.  I couldn't help but think how irresponsible this was.  Seriously.  Laws have been passed outlawing texting while driving because it causes too much distraction on the road.  I shudder to think what would happen if one were distracted in the bathroom!  Sure it looks harmless enough.  You even have the illusion of control.  But one slip is all it takes to send your phone plunging to where no one will go after it.  All your unmemorized numbers, your cool apps, music, pictures... all gone because you just had to text someone while on the pot.  Like it was all that urgent in the first place.  What could possibly not wait until you are finished and away from the swirling death?!  I mean, are you out of toilet paper and texting for help?  Fallen and can't get out?  Play by play on twitter?  Seriously people, just put it away.


  1. I vote play by play on twitter. Which, oddly, is NOT a feed I would want to subscribe to...

  2. really and truly, I thought you were saying that YOU were doing such a thing and almost skipped right over this because I didn't really want to hear about your 'accident'.

    I CONCUR! No TEXTING on the toliet!